Let’s Talk About Your Hair, Ross

It may be that Brit Hume kicked
off the most important debate
in recorded history last week—
A. Should Tiger Woods convert to
Christianity to save his image and
just possibly his soul? Or B. Is it
appropriate in a liberal democracy
for a cable news anchor to make
such suggestions? I’m not sure which.
Anyway, Ross, you’re looking at
me a little too intently from the sidebar
and I can’t help but wonder: why
the stubble goatee with shaved-
cheek action? And why the comb-back?

Ross, I can’t talk about faith with you
just yet because I’m too fixated on
the image of you doing half-goatee
maintenance. If you’re going to go
to all that trouble, just shave it all off,
amigo. Then I think we can talk about faith.
P.S. Let’s do something about that hair, too.

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Mary Valle lives in Baltimore and is the author of Cancer Doesn't Give a Shit About Your Stupid Attitude: Reflections on Cancer and Catholicism. She blogs on KtB as The Communicant. For more Mary, check out her blog or follow her on Twitter.