Ruffing’s Instructions

Your Grace, could you please
refrain from pointing your right
toe in? OK, now, Your Grace,
could you please not bite your
lower lip? Great. Now, Your
Grace, please, please, just
clasp your hands behind your
back. Because, sir, that little
twiddling thing you’re doing
with your sideburn is a little
distracting. No, not one touching
your cross. Both behind your
back. Like you’re a Peanuts
character. Great. OK, now
smile! OK, without the wink!
(We can fix that “little
girl” foot in photoshop)


Mary Valle lives in Baltimore and is the author of Cancer Doesn't Give a Shit About Your Stupid Attitude: Reflections on Cancer and Catholicism. She blogs on KtB as The Communicant. For more Mary, check out her blog or follow her on Twitter.