Thoughts detected above Ratzinger’s HQ

That damned American
Sister Formation Movement
was surely the work of Satan—
Only Lucifer could possibly think that
sisters needed higher education
For what? Teaching brats?
Cleaning bedpans?
Polishing chalices?

What did we get?
Goddess-worshipping, homosexual-loving,
apartment-dwelling, habit-shunning
PhDs—teaching in our universities!
Creating their own “theology!”
Disseminating blasphemy!
Working with the poor (I suppose that’s
all right, but… not out of uniform!)
And we footed the bill for all of this like

Well, guess what, “ladies?”
There’s a new keeper of
the Keys of Peter
You heretic witches
don’t have a chance
(in hell)


Mary Valle lives in Baltimore and is the author of Cancer Doesn't Give a Shit About Your Stupid Attitude: Reflections on Cancer and Catholicism. She blogs on KtB as The Communicant. For more Mary, check out her blog or follow her on Twitter.