Use the Right Prop, Michelle

Governor Perry, I’ve got more ideas for you, but I gotta talk to Mrs. Bachmann for a few minutes. Michelle: the “$2 gas” idea is great. Nice use of a Wal-Mart-i-an “loss-leader”… get them in the door with “limited supplies” of 50-cent taco filling, and watch them fill up their carts with high-ticket China-made gizmos. Good stuff, but next time you break this one out—and you should—use the right prop! It’s called a two-dollar bill. Start waving that Jefferson around with pride. Then your supporters can start waving them/using them in stores/altering them to have your picture where it should be. Not that I’m advocating defacing U.S. currency—wait—yes, I am. I want to see this nation awash in Bachmanns. Here’s $2.00 to get you started. Spend it all in one place: the gas station!

Mary Valle lives in Baltimore and is the author of Cancer Doesn't Give a Shit About Your Stupid Attitude: Reflections on Cancer and Catholicism. She blogs on KtB as The Communicant. For more Mary, check out her blog or follow her on Twitter.