Anarchy in My Fond Feelings for Jesus Christ Superstar

What would it take to make me not want to see a touring production of Jesus Christ Superstar in the summertime? This. Thoughts and Prayers, people, that I am not snatched into a white van, straightjacketed and have my eyelids forcibly propped open to force-witness this abomination while all I can do is “mmmph” through…